Archery Tournament and Thoughts about Family Traditions

One of my neighbours has set up her horse pasture with several targets and benches and is having a family archery tournament. I don't know if this is an annual Thanksgiving tradition, but it should be. What fun! How cool is that? 

It got me to thinking about family traditions. I don't know that I've been very good at establishing them with my own kids. There are some I wish I had implemented earlier. For example, on New Years Eve, I want to gather everyone together in the backyard, have everyone write down on paper all the disappointments and failures and challenges of the past year, and then burn the papers in a glorious campfire. I've done it myself and it's quite therapeutic, but I've never involved my kids in it, and I'm not sure why not.

On the other hand, sometimes we may catch ourselves mindlessly carrying on traditions and habits that brought joy to our ancestors or parents but only cause stress to try to pull off with our own family and its unique circumstances. We might try to live someone else's life, or impose our childhoods on our own children. Sometimes traditions need to be rethought and adapted to feel more authentic to our own situation. The pandemic has been good at teaching us to rethink our usual get-togethers and find creative ways to commemorate life events outside of our usual practices.

I have a friend who is fantastically successful at establishing family traditions with her kids and grandkids. They have family sports days, observances, and holiday events -- even something as simple as a girls' night out together turns into something memorable and amazing. She has a real talent for playing with her family. Sometimes I start to feel down about not keeping up. But I remind myself that her family all lives fairly close by, and she didn't work full time outside the home as her children were growing up. I can't compare my situation with hers and I shouldn't try to imitate her traditions or recreate her circumstances. I can only develop my own and be authentic to who my family is, taking into account their likes and dislikes and natural inclinations. Not one of my sons would enjoy a family sports day...but if we instituted a regular family Warhammer Painting Day, they'd be thrilled. We need to honour what makes our family unique.

But yeah, an archery tournament would be epic!